Back To School

For almost 18 years, my career was being a nanny to lots of really special kids! I loved being a nanny! I fed my maternal needs by taking care of these great kids. But, the truly hard part of my job was when it came to an end. It always did. The kids would get into school full time and the parents just couldn't justify having a full time nanny. So, I would start fresh with a new family. The last time though, I just knew I didn't want to start again. It was too hard and I was ready to try something new. So, I decided to go back to school. Actually, my sister helped alot in my making that decision. We were shopping and talking and I made the ultimate mistake of saying that I didn't know if I was "smart" enough to go to school after all these years! Yikes! Wrong thing to say! I got a complete dressing down right in the middle of the store! So, as I said, I decided to go back to school. I started slow, just a couple of classes, but I loved it! I thought Pharmacy school would be what I would like to do. I have slooooowly accumulated credits for these past few years. Life, death, and illnesses got in the way, but didn't stop me. One big thing changed though and that was when we decided to adopt! When we got our referral and then brought Mandy Rose home, I decided to take a year off from school. I wanted to focus solely on her. The past year has flown by! I have loved every minute of being with Mandy Rose, getting to know her and getting to know what being a momma is all about. Time keeps marching on, though, and this fall it was time to go back to school. I have taken all of my classes at a local community college. Great school, small classes, very hands on, half the expense....but now it was time to move to the big school! I have been beyond nervous about going to the university. I knew my classes were going to be large. I knew that hauling my oversize carcass around campus was going to be challenging. I knew I was going to be one of the minority older students. But, I just decided to put one foot in front of the other and trust that I would conquer this place! While pharmacy school was my original intent, I have changed my major to Medical Technology. When I decided on pharmacy, I was partly thinking I would go to school because I didn't have children. I could devote myself to all the work involved in going to pharmacy school. I could sacrifice and commute home weekly so I could attend the only pharmacy school in our state. All of that changed when Mandy Rose became a part of the picture. Now, I feel really good about the career I have chosen and it won't keep me away from my sweet baby girl! It has been a great first week! I have a great schedule and several very interesting classes! I walk around campus feeling very proud of myself for pushing through and continuing to work towards my goals. I prepared for my first week of school by touring the campus, making sure I had my textbooks, packing my backpack, buying those last minute supplies. The one thing I was totally unprepared for was how much I miss Mandy Rose when I am at school! I know I can't bring her, but in the middle of the day, I would give anything for one of her sweet kisses!

Testing the Waters of Daycare

Heading in with Daddy!

Yesterday, we took Mandy Rose to daycare for the very first time. I have taken this first year off to spend all my time with her and really cement our relationship. Now, I am starting back to school to finish my degree and that puts us in the position of utilizing daycare. We are very fortunate that the hospital that Gary works at has an excellent child development center. All of his co-workers with kids enrolled there love it! It is extremely reasonably priced and very convenient for Gary to drop her off before his shift. Also, being affiliated with the hospital, this daycare has later hours which we needed since one of my classes is an evening class. We are not the normal 9 to 5 family. Gary works second shift at the hospital, so he can be home until 2, but is gone most evenings.

See my spiffy new backpack!

Gary and I have both been really playing up daycare to Mandy Rose. We told her about getting to play with other kids and how they have a really cool playground. We also let her know that she gets to bring her nifty new backpack on the days that she goes! She has been excited about it, but then yesterday morning, every time I brought it up, she would shake her head "no". I thought, "Uh-oh", this could be problematic. But, in usual Mandy Rose form she had absolutely no problems.

"I can totally handle this guys!"

We actually didn't need daycare this day, but we wanted to have her first day be one where we could come and get her if she was really having problems. She was fine. We felt like something was missing all afternoon. I jumped up at one point thinking I had forgotten to get her up from nap. Gary checked the clock every few minutes just waiting until it was time to go pick her up! We love our little girl!!

Diving right in!

We were told that she did great! She was very talkative about all the things she did that afternoon! Gary said she just kind of looked up like, "Oh, hi Dad." when he got there. She gave me the biggest hug tight around my neck when she got home! I think she had a good time, but I also think she missed her Momma and Daddy a wee bit!

I had one more picture to post, but Daddy warned me she might not appreciate its presence in the ether later on in life. I was showing her one of the NEAT things about daycare is the potty that was just her size! Of course, she had to go pee then and I had to take a picture of it! It may not go on the blog, but it is definitely going in the scrapbook!!

The Passing of a Friend

Today is a sad day at our house. We had to make the decision to put our 13 year old cat, Sejanus, to sleep. He is a cat that insisted on going outside! We didn't really want him to, but he would sit at the door and yowl non-stop until you let him out. I told Gary that letting him outside might shorten his life, but keeping him inside would definitely do it!! Anyways, he has been allowed out for the last several years. He, unfortunately, didn't know how to back down from a fight and was not capable of winning one. He started limping a few weeks ago. When I examined him, I couldn't find any sign of a wound, so I thought he just sprained something. But, I was wrong and it got infected really badly. We have been doctoring him here at home (have lots of experience from previous battle wounds), but today, it became obvious he needed to visit the vet. The infection in his leg was quite bad and it was going to cost at least $600 to heal him. It was a difficult decision, but we did what we thought was best. I have complained about him for years....his yowling, his frequent wounds to nurse him through, his propensity for eating and drinking and then immediately yakkin' it up on my carpet. But, I cried like a baby when we buried him beneath our lilac bush.

We explained to Mandy Rose that Sejanus was very sick so the doctor made him go to sleep. We told her that he doesn't hurt anymore and is with God. I don't know if this was the best way to go about it, but how do you explain death to a 3 year old?

Today is my birthday. I am 44 years old. I find myself thinking about the 40 years difference between Mandy Rose and me. Her daddy is almost 52 so they have 48 years between them. Some people probably think we are nuts to have a little one "at our age". Sometimes, I wonder if Mandy Rose will mind having older parents? Will she feel strangely about our age when she is a teenager? I know that, in general, she will think we are weird when she is a teenager no matter what our age, but will it be troublesome to her? I also think about my desire to adopt again. Gary isn't sure. He is perfectly happy with our family unit as it is. But, I envision a sibling for Mandy Rose. Another little one to call me Momma. But, at what age is it irresponsible or selfish to have another child? Is there even such an age? I don't feel old. I feel tired most days, but I don't think that is because of my age. I think a certain 3 year old has a little bit to do with that! Another birthday has come and gone, and I just find myself thinking....